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Monday, July 5, 2010

Lost within my own mind

and that's the best place to be, I guess.

Happy Independence Day, everyone.

I've started writing again, a lot. JulNoWriMo. You'll remember that last November I did NaNoWriMo [National Novel Writing Month] and came up just short of the 50 thousand words in one month. But for those of us who are truly crazy, there is NaNo in July. I'm actually almost on top of my word count, but it's just a few days in. On the other hand I have way more time in summer. Or I like to think so. July is gonna be killer.

Last night I went to a rather splendid performance by the local AAA may remember my posts about their awesome amateur shows last summer, and at Christmas.

Today we had lunch with my grandmother, and then tooled around home until evening. Then my dad and I went into town to Red White and Blues festival....lots of good rock, blues, and etc music and other fun times downtown.

I am angry and feeling sorry for myself. I am trying to accept the fact that there is not really anyone in this town who cared enough about me to want to spend the 4th of July with me. And that's not entirely true, a few people were already busy.

The best thing to do is obviously make peace with this fact and even...embrace it. I can be the lone wolf when I need to. In fact, I tend to work better alone. If I have a job to do, no matter what it is, I am usually happy. And useful. I can do that again. Get through the summer and come September, there will be something to occupy every minute. Make the good grades, keep the FLL teams enthused, get the funding for our FRC team, get the scholarships, get admitted to DigiPen Institute of Technology.

I was all depressed and now I'm not. Yeah, I definitely just talked about God to one of my friends for about two hours. I can only say I'm thankful....that God can use me. That I can still help. That He makes things work out all right in the end.

It's a new day now, early on the morning of July 5th.


Abby Rogers said...

I see from your profile that you are interested in England! Have you checked out my blog yet?

I post photographs of glorious vistas of the countryside and interesting tidbits of Great Britain for the pleasure of Anglophiles everywhere! There’s also something special every Wednesday…. Have a look, maybe you’ll join the ever-growing list of followers!

Gwenea Zestia Binn said...


(by the way, apparently people haven't been able to find my blog since I changed the URL, so just for future reference it's now

Gwenea Zestia Binn said...


Anonymous said...

Awesome soundtrack!

Rochelle Blue said...

aww honey, I'm sorry you felt like that D: if I lived in Oregon, I would have totally spent it with you...

good luck on JulNoWriMo! are you writing that story we talked about or are you saving that one for november?

Bethany said...

....this is an interesting mix of comments :)
Gwen, that's interesting, ohorsefeathers used to be a really good blog that I followed, but the author stopped blogging and I think deleted her blog mebbe :/ that was a sad day..but yah, I'm following your blog and i THINK that doesn't change when the URL does...better check tho :P

Tragedy, thanks! :) it's a lot of stuff I love to listen to, obviously...with some songs that bring back epic memories from robotics competitions...

Rochelle, aww :) I woulda loved to spend the 4th with you too :) As far as JulNoWriMo, ergh....I sorta stopped....but I think I'm going to keep writing though, just at a slower pace and worry more about plot and less about word count....I'm actually finishing off the novel I wrote last November, and the plot REALLY suffered....oh well :P